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We Get Letters. . .
Thank you so very much for your kind communications with me last night and today. Your suggestions and comments are thought-provoking and insightful. I counsel with many people about their situations, but when it comes to my own, I seem to lose objectivity and need guidance myself! - A Therapist (Name withheld by request)

Larry James

Personal Relationship Coaching

Speak One-on-One with Larry James

Has your relationship hit a brick wall?

Things not so "hot" in the bedroom? No more romance? Wanna heat things up?  -  Larry James will help you break through the barrier!

Heart made of brick

In a society flooded with self-help information, sometimes hearing the words or reading the books just isn't enough. You may have the facts but don't know how to apply them. To meet this need, you are invited to call Larry James for coaching.

Larry James is a "solution finder." He is available by telephone for personal relationship coaching for high functioning singles and married couples; people who are committed to "doing" whatever it takes to make their relationships work. Mature people know their relationships can always be better. A healthier love relationship is the goal.

Larry believes it is nearly impossible to inspire couples to change when his path (and yours too) is blocked by the sacred cow:  "There is only one answer for each relationship problem." This is not true. It is better to kill the sacred cow. Sacred cows make the best hamburgers.

There really are no pat answers. Men and women are different. Every couple relates to their problems differently. It is a wonder men and women get along as well as they do.

Coaching boy

Larry's job is to be curious and to help you gain more understanding. A good relationship coach doesn't claim to have all the answers for why you are the way you are although we may have some ideas that we will willingly share with you. When it comes to getting answers and more understanding, we will form hypotheses together and you will come to your own conclusions. A relationship coach facilitates that process. They don't tell you how to think, believe or act.

He is not here to give you advice. He will be there for you to share his knowledge with you and help you make your own decisions that are balanced, rational, and well-explored. Strengthening your own reasoning and decision-making skills will increase your independence and self-esteem.

He can help you gain more clarity, more understanding, and form a plan of action, but relationship coaching is not a magic pill that erases all issues. It takes work, and YOU have to do the work. If you're up for the challenge, he will be there every step of the way!

When you speak to him about your relationship issues... he listens!

Smart relationship coaches don't know everything - that's why they ask such good questions.

The wise man doesn't give the right answers, he poses the right questions. - Claude Levi-Strauss

Have any of these issues in your relationship?

  1. Broken Trust
  2. Emotional Neglect
  3. Addictive Behaviors
  4. Little or No Affection
  5. Emotional or Physical Abuse
  6. on the verge of Divorce
  7. Boredom
  8. Separation
  9. A Stubborn Partner
  10. Emotional Infidelity
  11. Silent Treatments
  12. No Sex or Intimacy
  13. Poor or No Communication
  14. Lack of Appreciation
  15. No Success with Prior Relationship Coaching or Therapy
  16. Infidelity
  17. Sudden or abrupt breakups
  18. Having trouble "forgiving?"

If you have any of these issues in your relationship, Larry James can help you!

Relationship Momentum Twarted by a Boulder in the Road??

Boulder in the Road Sometimes trying to fix your own relationship is like standing in a bucket and trying to lift yourself up by the handle.

Larry's ability to be your "committed listener" enables him to better understand the problem. He listens for clues that suggest questions you may have overlooked. Often the answer can be found within the question. It may be a question you are afraid to ask yourself. It may be a question with an answer you know and do not want to accept. He listens for clues that present solutions he can suggest that are unique to "your" relationship.

To experience breakthroughs in your relationship you must accept and embrace mistakes/problems. They are there to make you. . . not break you. First you must acknowledge the mistake/problem, have the courage to talk with someone with the wisdom to help you, learn from the experience, offer forgiveness (if necessary), take steps to prevent its reoccurence and move on.

Learning can only take place outside the shadow of pride. Anything that resists correction is a part of what is wrong. - Guy Finley

If you are experiencing situations in your relationship that prevent the full expression of love for your partner, you are invited to arrange for a personal relationship coaching session by telephone with Larry James. You can count on him to offer the support you need for those everyday problems that inevitability occur in relationships.

During his nearly three year tenure as host of the "Mars & Venus Chat Room" on America Online, Dr. John Gray, Ph.D. personally directed Larry to answer the thousands of relationship questions that were sent to Dr. Gray by e-mail. Although Larry is not a therapist, he has assisted singles and couples with answers to more than 5,000 relationship questions for Dr. Gray under his own name and thousands of addition relationship questions through his relationship coaching.

Larry's relationship books are reviewed prior to publication for authenticity, accuracy and content by a team of professional therapists and counselors. . .

  • Dr. Larry Losoncy, Ph.D. (Tulsa, OK), a family therapist
  • Patty Kellogg, M.A. (Vancouver, WA), a private practice counselor
  • Dr. John Gray, Ph.D. (Mill Valley, CA), author, "Men Are From Mars, Woman Are From Venus"
  • Michael Najarian, M.A. (Bainbridge Island, WA), counselor and former associate of Dr. John Gray, Ph.D.

Sometimes the greatest journey is the distance between two people! -
Larry James

Many therapists and ministers have endorsed Larry's work in the relationship area by encouraging their clients/parishioners to read his relationship books, specifically "How to Really Love the One You're With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship."

Here are only a handful of the "Thank Yous" Larry has received from people whose hearts have been touched by his personal relationship coaching.
heart Thank you for being there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on. You were so compassionate and understanding that it made me cry. I realized I definitely had a serious problem to deal with, and you helped me to realize that. Since then I have been making a conscious effort to find ways to develop a healthy relationship between my husband and myself.
heart Thank you so much for your quick reply. You helped me through a particularly difficult day!
heart Thank you for your guidance. Your advice has shown me a side that I never acknowledged. It means changing my outlook on life (for the better) through a process of self-reflection. I do realize that this is important for a healthier attitude towards myself and towards others. It will take time. I did live in the shadow of the relationship, and the sacrifice was my own self-esteem.
heart Thank you for your advice. You're right. It was not the answer I wanted to hear, however it was the answer I needed to know!
heart It is really amazing how we are communicating more and better. I couldn't imagine how good our relationship could be. We are both learning to be especially honest about what we want and need from one another. I don't feel guilty or selfish anymore when I make my requests known. It feels great!!! We are "Celebrating Love!" I thank God for people like you who have seen the need through your experiences to help people and their relationships to succeed. You have made a difference in our lives and for that we will be forever grateful.
heart THANKS so much for your response! Wow! It contained so much information I will need to read it several times in order to absorb it all! What you say makes sense to me. I am currently in the process of gathering my resources; i.e., God, a counselor, support group, friends and family that I think will be helpful as I attempt (one more time) to end this affair. Thanks so much for being here and having the desire to help others!
heart Thanks so much for your response to my question about forgiving (after the) discovery of years of infidelity of my partner. Your words are very inspirational and I will save them to re-read as needed. I am most appreciative.
heart When you are in the middle of a very confusing situation, it is sometimes hard to evaluate available options. Thanks for outlining options for me and for giving suggestions. Maybe now I can move forward a bit.
heart Thanks so much for the insight and wisdom that you've shared so freely and without restraint at such a critical time in my life. Things have improved greatly in my marriage and I'm looking to God to do a greater miracle in our hearts and our life. When things were so rough I would always ask myself if the point in question would "build up" or "tear down". It was a great tool of direction for me. Your books, advise, chats, and letters that you poured yourself into surely did MUCH to build up my marriage and my self. It also restored hope and respect. It is my hope that we truly do meet someday. Thanks for touching and making a positive change in my life.
heart Your coaching last January has helped me a lot and your advice stays with me. I have grown and changed so much in the last year. I am so grateful for your wisdom, kindness and loving spirit that you share with the world. Thank you for telling me, "like it is." I appreciate your approach to relationships with such honesty and compassion. The universe needs you; you are certainly one of God's special angels doing his work here on earth. Thank you, Larry!
heart Things are going very well. Communication between us is better and we're planning almost weekly date nights for the next month. I sent him a card at his work and that really helped his attitude, so thank you for that suggestion. I want you to know that it is very comforting to know that there are people like you that have such a genuine care and love to help others. I hope that many others benefit from your knowledge and wisdom.
heart Close to a year and a half ago I contacted you concerning a girlfriend of mine. I took your advice about letting go and moving on and applied it accordingly. Within 1 month of that experience I met my sweetheart. I am happy to announce that we were recently engaged and will be married in August 2003. Thank you for your continued support!

The best time -- in fact, the only time -- to make a real change in your life is in the moment of seeing the need for it. He who hesitates always gets lost in the hundred reasons why tomorrow is a better day to get started! - Guy Finley

Always remember. . .

Relationships are something that must be worked on "ALL THE TIME," not only when they are broken and need to be fixed.

Relationships rarely fix themselves. Never walk on eggshells, afraid to bring up sensitive issues. If your relationship is on the rocks and you aren't moving toward either a solution or dissolution, then you aren't actively managing the process and need to take a more proactive role.

Let fresh eyes discover new solutions and offer suggestions that will help you with your nagging relationship issues. Be prepared to truthfully answer the questions Larry asks you about your relationship.

Larry James pulls no punches. He tells it like it is. If the truth hurts. . . be grateful.

Larry lives in Scottsdale, AZ and can also arrange to be your relationship coach face-to-face.

Please DO NOT CALL if you intend to make no changes. Expert advice only helps if you listen and change your behavior. Larry's inspirational guidance can and will help! If you have a basic urgency to make your relationship better and are ready to take full responsibility for your relationship and make some changes in the way you are being in your relationship, you are encouraged to call.

When it comes to 'What should I do?' about the painful negative states we see in ourselves, here is all we need to know: what is condemned remains concealed; what is concealed never heals. - Guy Finley

Larry shares his inspired insight with clarity, style and good taste. He is a thoughtful, compassionate coach. He fully acknowledges his responsibility to practice what he teaches; inspiring others by example. Larry James is a gifted teacher; a specialist in matters of the heart.

It is highly recommended that you read the following articles prior to calling to arrange for a confidential relationship coaching session by telephone.

And if All Else Fails?
12 Ways to Get 10 Times the Value of Calls From A Coach

NOTE: Larry James is an expert networker and offers coaching for beginner and advanced networkers. In June, 1987, he founded of the incredibly successful "Tulsa Business Connection" and taught their members to exchange more than $1,000,000 in business leads in their first year! He is the author of the best selling networking book, Ten Commitments of Networking: Creative Ways to Maximize Your Personal Connections. To read articles on business networking, go to "The Networking Articles MENU."

"Larry James speaks from the heart. His words carefully craft a message of hope that inspires couples to work together in a spirit of love and understanding. The powerful effect of his work in the area of
relationships can change your life!"

Jack Canfield, Bestselling Co-Author
Chicken Soup for the Soul series

I found your articles helpful and did not think I needed extensive counseling, just a push in the right direction. Based on what you had written I felt your approach was good for me. I was right that you were the right call to make. Thank you. - D.R. (Name withheld by request)
Thanks, Larry. Your support and expert advice really helped - D.A. (Name withheld by request)

He that won't be counseled can't be helped - Benjamin Franklin

NOTE:  November and December are months that typically bring to mind family and friends. It is often a difficult time for people who have lost a loved one through death, divorce or separation. If you need to talk to someone who will listen during the holidays. . . call Larry James today!

Call now to arrange an appointment for personal relationship coaching. Half hour and one hour coaching fees are available. Appointments after regular office hours are available upon request.

"Learning can only take place outside the shadow of pride. Anything that resists correction is a part of what is wrong." - Guy Finley

Free advice is not respected and it is seldom implemented. Those who pay have a greater respect for information than those getting it free. - Markus Allen

Sign on a Synagogue Bulletin Board

Don't give up. Moses was once a basket case too.

"The greatest thing you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to them their own." - Benjamin Disraeli, Former British Prime Minister

Larry's Note: That's what a great coach does!

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